This is actually for the one's who have adopted. Who want only everything for their child and nothing more.
Give them your love, your time, and listen.
I know this is what all good parents should do, or what they've heard, or have been told before, but if you have adopted a child, these things get blurred. As any parents'.
But it can be different. I, being a 30 something adoptee, know. Speaking with many families, adoptees and others, I understand the wanting and wishing for more.
Not from my biological mother, family, or that such. Just in experience of how the adopted family reacts, perceives, and follows through with their child.
Remember their first word/words. Remember their dislikes and likes. Remember their talents and all of the good they brought to you. Don't get yourself in a rut in giving them everything they want under the sun, and just trusting that they will not try and get what they want from everything, and or everyone in life, as early as you can imagine!
Even I was a very difficult child, teen and now a mother, wife, and still difficult, but loving caring, traveled, well mannered, socially A-OK and any normal person from a well to do family.
This may be pre-empted by my own emotions, ...haha..IT'S A BLOG!!!... But I know that some parents who have adopted and are doing some of the same mistakes my parents did. They are awesome people, and I love them. I feel I need to share these common things, I've lived through and have seen over, and over again with adopted children/families.
Over compensation, from giving the child everything under the sun the child wants.
Giving in, in situations that the child has an opportunity to learn from-that only hinders the parents in the long run and the child .
Feeling obligated to do what ever it takes to make the child happy, even if this may only teach the child to act this way over, and over again, until, they are adults, NOT giving them the hard lessons to learn on their own in the real world, and leaving the child feeling dependent on the parent.
In this case, the child may be supported financially, but has missed the opportunity to learn.
Also, in most cases, desires an attachment that monetary things will not for fill, Making the child feel even more lost and longing comfort, love,emotional support and a willing listening ear....that will remember.
So maybe old age has a say in it, my parents are getting up there, but I know they really only remember the bad things, not the first words I spoke( I was adopted @ 6 months) or that at 30 something...I STILL HATE ONIONS!!
Maybe I just got lucky and got a lot of good things in life that I may have not. Or that I see the things I wish I had, from my parents, tradition, wholesomeness, caring, and love the way I see my husbands family does it. While mine say hi, eat, scurry to leave just hand over a check..... I guess it could be worse.
This blog is directed to the certain people, I know, or whom may be in this array of events. I mean no harm to the less fortunate that can't give everything to their kids money can buy. YOU are probably doing the best job ever! Spending your time, and efforts with them raising them because you know this is what you were suppose to do!
First time blogger.... hand it over!! Or share the love!~peace
